Arrrrrgghh.

The time honored tradition of walking the plank. Per wikipedia:

Walking the plank is a phrase that describes a form of murder or torture that was practiced by pirates, mutineers and other rogue seafarers. It involved the victim being forced to walk off the end of a wooden plank or beam extended over the side of a ship, thereby falling into the water to drown, often into the vicinity of sharks.

I'm standing on the plank right now. The sharks circle, they can smell blood. A stick pokes me in the back, spurring me to take a step further.

Yup, my times as a full-fledged (not just a fake) MS2 start up tomorrow. I am on the end of the proverbial summer plank and in 18 precious hours my life will once again consist of sink or swim time amongst the sharks.

The start of MS2 feels very different from MS1. There are some pluses. You know you can handle medical school just fine, you already feel like you're starting to establish a fund of knowledge, you have your study habits and know they work.

The drawback of knowing the ropes is that you... know the ropes. I know that my days will consist of endlessly staring at information. I know about all the work and time required. I know that the speed of information gets ramped up second year. I know there's this small little test looming in the distance called Hurricane USMLE. Surprisingly, these things do not make me anxious. Really, anxious would be one of the words farthest from how I would describe how I feel right now. Rather they just make me apathetic.

Waking up tomorrow and heading to class will feel just like another day of med school. All the wide eyed fluffy optimism of first year is gone, and now begins the trudge, through second year, through Step 1, through 3rd year, never ceasing.

Of course, part of me is still excited to get started again. My liver will appreciate the break. And, frankly, I really enjoyed my times as an MS1 and kind of went to medical school for the purpose of learning medicine, so it's my own damn fault that they expect you to learn stuff every once and a while.

But saying goodbye to the last summer break of your life is not easy. So goodbye, sleeping in 5 days a week. Goodbye, drinking on Wednesday-though-Saturdays. Goodbye, completely unregimented schedules. Goodbye, 2:00am bar close. Goodbye outdoor all day festivals.

But it's time to do this thing.